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Barnstoneworth United Football Club
C-Grade over 35s : Denley Moor Academicals 2019
After three generations of inciting conflict between natural yeasts of the Pinot Gris and the Pinot Noir, Phil Bennett has pulled on the boots in a peace-making midfield role for Denley Moor.
Best known as a starting guard with the Philadelphia 76ers during the late nineties and as a pioneer of developing cold fusion at RMIT, Cino Kurian was signed to Denley for a reputed 6-figure sum.
The father of Balinese gamelan music, Harley Smith is bringing complex rhythms and subtle disonance to his role in the forward line for Denley Moor.
Three decades as a recluse in a Nepalese monastery, left its mark with Dave Walker when he came on for Middlesborough in the 1997 FA Cup final. Spotted by Denley scouts, Walker was signed in January transfer window.
After a decade as 2nd violin with the Berlin Philharmonic, Anees Kas was signed by Aston Villa and then sent on-loan to Bayern Munich in the Bundes Liga. Spotted by Barnstoneworth scouts, he signed with Denley at the start of 2019 season.
Best known as a stunt double for David Attenborough during the filming of the Blue Planet series, Stephen Johnson came off the bench to score for Liverpool in the 1971 FA Cup final, catching the eye of Denley scouts.
A handfull of Oscar nominations for cutting-edge documentaries on Nicuragian needle-point tradition was put aside when Nick Hyndes closed the transfer window to sign with Denley Moor.
Part of the team who discovered the Higgs Boson (the theoretical mechanism that underpins the understanding of the origin of sub-atomic particles) Shepherd Shambira, was overlooked for the 2013 Nobel Prize and instead signed with Denley at the start of the 2019 season.
Four years as a gun-shearer for the NZ national side and a dozen seasons in the starting line up for Llanfairpwll FC, has delivered the intestinal fortitude Jerome Luke needs to keep for Denley Moor in 2019.
The founding father of civilisation in four separate star systems, Michael Brindle is settling down to normality in the backline with Denley Moor.
Best known for his pioneering development of DNA sequencing, Dan Rumbold joined Denley Moor in a complex trade with Boston Red Sox.
Raised by a lost pack of wolves in the outer Shetland Islands before being discovered and rescued by roaming Sussex pygmies, Michael Lewis went on to play fourteen seasons for Wolverhampton Wanderers Under 8s before signing in the January 2018 transfer window for Brighouse. He was poached for the 2019 season by Denley scouts following threats of violence and vegemite incentives.
After four tours of duty as Panzer tank commander with coallition forces in Iraq, Mike Badman switched to Denley Moor in the off-season from Aston Villa.
After two seasons as social media consultant with Ariana Grande and a mid-season transfer from the AFC Bournemouth cherries, Richie Shields is settling to his new role with Denley Moor.
Appointed to the High Court in 1952 by Sir Robert Menzies, Pat Driver is taking his black-letter law interpretations to a new level as the last-line of defence with Denley Moor.
The pressure of first violin with the Moscow Philharmonic didn't present enough challenges for Anthony Love who took up an $65 million transfer offer with Denley Moor.
After representing Iceland in both Rugby League and Curling, Dan Hiller joined Denley Moor after 14 stellar seasons playing at silly-point with the Brisbane Farnarklers.
After four seasons on the bench for both Queens Park Rangers and the New York Knicks, Al Reeder was keener to sign with Denley than words could possibly express.
Six years on the catwalk in London, Rome and New York wasn't enough for Chris Cameron who was traded to Denley from EPL club Brighton during the mid-season window.
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